Search results for horns husband
21,
00:35,
2008-02-07 02:54:13 Description: When the harvest is over, the people of Tamil Nadu express their gratitude to the gods, the earth and their cattle. For four days, they celebrate with abandon and worship with devotion. Pongal, the (More) When the harvest is over, the people of Tamil Nadu express their gratitude to the gods, the earth and their cattle. For four days, they celebrate with abandon and worship with devotion. Pongal, the harvest festival in mid-January is a very important one in Tamil Nadu.
Pongal festivities continue through the first four days of the Tamil month of Thai (mid-January to mid-February). The houses are cleaned, painted and decorated. People wear new clothes and the cattle are gaily caparisoned with beads, bells and flowers--their horns painted and capped with gleaming metals.
TIME OF THE YEAR
Pongal falls in mid-January, at the beginning if Thai, which is a month of hope and joy and is considered very auspicious for marriages As a Tamil saying goes, "When Thai is born, it paves the way for hope." The month prior to Thai is Margazhi, considered inauspicious as it symbolizes the death of the sun as it journeys to the winter solstice. It is, however, believed that if a young unmarried woman offers prayers daily before dawn, the Gods would bless her with a suitable husband.
CELEBRATIONS
Though more popular in the rural areas, it is celebrated with the same gusto and fervor by the urban population too and the preparations are quite elaborate.
One can notice beautiful Kolams (decorative patterns made on the floor with rice flour) gracing the entrance of most houses. Kolams are generally drawn, traditionally speaking, with rice flour, the idea being that insects would feed on it and bless the household. The kolam also bore sociological significance and is even today religiously performed as a threshold ceremony before dawn in traditional households. Today, the kolam serves decorative purposes, and therefore almost no one takes the pain to draw it with rice flour. Instead, substitutes that can make instant kolams are popularly used.
At the center of the Kolam is a lump of cow-dung, which holds a five-petalled pumpkin flower--a symbol of fertility and an offering of love to the presiding deity. However, one thing that distracts from the solemnity of the festival is the film music blaring out of microphones.
Major festivals in the south are irrevocably linked to the buying of new clothes and the preparing of sweets and other delicacies. The shops are flooded with new things begging to be bought. For women, it is a must to put flowers in their hair, as this is considered auspicious.
Several community events like bullfight and bird fights are organized and community dinners made from the newly harvested crop are enjoyed by all.
RITUALS
All the four days of Pongal have their own significance as separate deities are worshipped each day. On the first day, Bhogi or the Rain God is worshipped. The day begins with a til oil bath and in the evening there is a bonfire in which all the rubbish in the house is burnt.
The second day is that of the Surya Pongal. The place where the Pongal puja is to be done, usually the courtyard or open terrace, is washed a day prior to the festival, smeared with cow-dung, and left to dry. Pretty kolams are drawn, which are special to the occasion. At the place where the puja is to be performed, a delicious concoction of rice, moong dal, jaggery and milk is cooked in a new earthenware pot on an open fire. But before that, some fresh ginger is tied around the pot. As the Pongal boils over and spills out of the pot, children waiting for this go around the pot, clapping their hands and crying "Pongalo Pongal". Once the Pongal is ready, it is tempered with cashew nuts and raisins fried in ghee.
The Pongal is offered, on a new banana leaf along with other traditional delicacies like Vadas, and payasam, to the Sun God in gratitude for bestowing his blessings on the land and the harvest. Sugarcane, grain, sweet potatoes etc. are also offered.
The third day is that of the cattle worship or Mattu Pongal. On this day, the cattle are caparisoned and paraded in the village after they have been offered the Pongal. The fourth and final day marks the KanyaPongal, when birds are worshipped. Major attractions of this day are bull and bird fights.
The Sankranti Rath (chariot) is a typical Pongal kolam. Earlier, the ropes of the rath were kept open till the day after Pongal, when all were "joined" from house to house symbolizing a collective desire to realize an uninterrupted cosmic cycle. Today, no one has the time or inclination to be quite so ritualistic and patterns are confined to houses and the immediate area outside it. (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: announcements federal government grassroots local nonprofit outreach pongal public regional service state tamil
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28,
03:27,
2007-05-26 04:15:33 Description: This video is dedicated to Tamara....
Art photos of Cher from one of her lost albums from the 70's plus others, along with the song, "Knock On Wood" from her lost 1976 album, (More) This video is dedicated to Tamara....
Art photos of Cher from one of her lost albums from the 70's plus others, along with the song, "Knock On Wood" from her lost 1976 album, "I'd Rather Believe In You". By lost I mean it has never been released on CD. A little history about this album.
In 1976 Cher was married to Gregg Allman (she married him right after her divorce from Sonny Bono was final, on a weekend trip to Harrah's Las Vegas thanks to Bill Harrah's kind offer of a free plane trip. She would file for divorce from Gregg 11 days later and then recoinciled when she discovered her pregnancy) and doing the second Sonny and Cher show after asking Sonny to rejoin her as she was over wealmed doing her successful solo variety show CHER on CBS. Cher was VERY pregnant with her son Elijah Blue Allman during recording. The photos used on the album cover were actually taken for another of her lost Warner Brother's albums, Stars. Since she was so pregnant she did not wanna have her picture taken. So here she was doing a television variety show with her ex-husband, pregnant by her second husband and all of this was on television every week! Cher wore her revealing Bob Mackie gowns, sang, danced, and did comedy sketches. I remember one week she was so far along they had to put her in a bathtub full of bubbles to hide her expanding tummy. Elijah Blue Allman was born on July 10, 1976. Elijah, also known by his stage name Phillip Exeter Blue I, is the half brother of Chastity Bono, Delilah Island Allman, and Devon Allman . He is the lead singer and guitarist for the rock band Deadsy which consists of Alec Pure on drums, Dr. Nner on synthesizer, Carlton Megalodon on Z-tar, and Jens Funke on bass. At the age of 13, he toured as a guitarist with Cher on her "Heart of Stone Tour"; he was given his first guitar by Kiss bassist Gene Simmons who Cher was dating at the time.. Deadsy released two albums: 2002's Commencement and Phantasmagore, which came out on August 22, 2006.
Elijah has said on MTV in interview on a program about children of famous rock musicians that, "I respect The Allman Brothers Band very much, but I've always been more into Black Sabbath, David Bowie, and Metallica."
It was announced in February 2007 that Elijah is working on a solo record.......
Cher raised Chastity and Elijah as a single mother....
Cher was on the cover of every tabliod you can name every single week!
Here is the track listing for the album and its production and staff credits.
Side 1
Long Distance, Love Affair
I"d Rather Believe In You
I Know (You Don't Love Me No More)
Silver Wings & Golden Rings
Flash Back
Side 2
It's A Cryin' Shame
Early Morning Strangers
Knock On Wood
Spring
Borrowed Time
Produced by Steve Barry & Michael Omartian
Arranged and conducted by Michael Omartian
Musicians
All Keyboard Michael Omartian
Drums Jeff Porcarno
Bass David Hungate, Lee Sklar, Scotty Edwards
Guitars Dean Parks, Ben Benay, Lee Ritenour, Victor Feldman, Steve Barri
Harmonica Ben Benay
Horns Chuck Findlay, Steve Madaio, Nino Tempo, Steve Douglas and Lew McCreary
The Sid Sharp Stings
Concertmaster Sid Sharp
Backgroud Vocals
Ginger Blake, Julian Tillman, Maxine Williard, Jim Haas, Kerry Chater, Michael Omartian, Stephanie Spring, Gene Nelson, Michael Price, Dan Walsh
Recorded at ABC Recording Studios Inc.
Engineer Phil Kaye
Assistant engineer Howard Gale
Album Coordinator Karen White
And a special thanks to Elijah, for waiting until the day after I finished my album....Cher.
Art Direction by Ed Thrasher
Photograpy By Norman Seeff
This song was later recorded by Ami Stewart as a dance track and was a BIG hit. Wonder where Ami Stewart is now?
It's like thunder,
It's like lightening,
The way you love me is frightening...
I better knock...
On Wood!
Baby! (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: 1976 Actress Album Ami Believe Bono Cher Diva Id In Knock legend Lost On Rather Singer Stewart Wood You
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390,
06:29,
2007-05-31 10:57:00 Description: From the Bel Canto Opera production: Master Ford, calling himself Master Brook, has called on Sir John Falstaff to establish if he is having an affair with his wife, Mistress Ford, by urging him on. (More) From the Bel Canto Opera production: Master Ford, calling himself Master Brook, has called on Sir John Falstaff to establish if he is having an affair with his wife, Mistress Ford, by urging him on. Falstaff relates how he was smuggled out of the house in a laundry basket under Ford's nose, then dumped into the River Thames.
FORD: (AS BROOK): You were in the basket?
FALSTAFF:Yes, alas! Pray, pity me...I with my enormity...
curled and cramped, my bones were creaking,
up my nose, the clothes were reeking,
till chilled waves, which came on board,
cooled my lust for Mistress Ford!
Look, dear Brook, have sympathy for such indignity.
FORD: Ah, indeed, a tragedy, Sir, my heart doth bleed for thee
to be subject to such ruction,
in the midst of your seduction
of the fragrant Mistress Ford...
then be doused as your reward...
'tis a fate most untoward!
Now that you have faced disaster,
you'll leave mistress to her master?
FALSTAFF: That old cuckold's gone away,
I'll seduce her... this very day.
FORD: (aside) The swine! Poltroon! But hold! Calm! (to FALSTAFF) What? You'll go again so soon?
FALSTAFF: Just this morning she did write me to invite me to her arms.
She has promised to delight me and excite me with her charms.
Her husband's off to shoot some pheasant - he'll be gone much of the day,
She says "Sir John, 'twould be most pleasant if we made love while he's away.
On bended knees I beg you please, love me while he's away!"
FORD: So you're planning to partake?
FALSTAFF:I'll go once more...for your sake.
FORD: Then a thousand thanks, kind Sir
(aside) I'll demolish you, you cur!
FALSTAFF: Time to go, it;s nearly nine
If I'm late it will upset her.
FORD: Yes, today will go much better.
FALSTAFF: Yes, today will go much better.
FORD: Your pursuit will suit me fine
FALSTAFF: For us both it will be fine
FORD: I am hopeful
FALSTAFF: I can tell, Sir.
FORD: 'twill be fruitful.
FALSTAFF: 'twill go well, Sir
FORD: Now be off...it's nearly nine
FALSTAFF: Now I'm off, it's going nine.
BOTH: I am hopeful, 'twill be fruitful. for the outlook's looking fine, now I'm off, it's going nine.
FALSTAFF: Rejoice, my friend, rejoice, my friend,
our plan, you will discover
will be successful in the end,
and we'll both be her lover.
The husband who his mistress scorns
for us will wear a pair of horns
(to the pair of horns in the orchestra) Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
FORD: (aside) Beware my friend, beware my friend,
my plan is to pursue you.
If you touch Alice, I intend to run my sword clean through you.
Such joy 'twill give me to impale...or should I say ..."harpoon" this whale!
BOTH: Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Rejoice, my friend, rejoice, my friend,
our plan, you will discover
will be successful in the end,
and we'll both be her lover.
I am hopeful 'twill be fruitful
but now my friend it's time for us to steal away,
for us to implement the content of plan 'A'
Today's the day, and come what may
with Mistress Ford, we'll have our way,
for as they say "swhern cats will stray, the mouse will play"
Farewell Sir.
FORD: (aside) I'll thrash this libertine!
FALSTAFF: (aside) Such a fool I've never seen!
BOTH: My friend, today's the very day the cat's away, the mouse will play,
with Mistress Ford we'll have our way, so come what may, today's the day!
words © Tom Boyd (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: bateman bel boyd brook canto falstaff ford lamb martin merry nicolai of opera otto robert shakespeare windsor wives
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20,
03:00,
2008-04-21 17:03:56 Description: I am sorry that this is so pixelated and low res - I am trying to fix that without getting booted from the contest - I may post a separate, better copy. This is my YouTube Sketchies II submission, (More) I am sorry that this is so pixelated and low res - I am trying to fix that without getting booted from the contest - I may post a separate, better copy. This is my YouTube Sketchies II submission, and the launch of my channel. CowboyMachine is the future home of My Pink Pimp. Very Important: LEAVE COMMENTS - RATE THE VIDEO - OK? The video contains snippets of the song "Satan Is Real," the full song is too long to put in its entirety. Here are the lyrics for the full song: "Satan is Real" - hear it all at www.MySpace.com/earlemonroe Verse 1 Some people say there's no such thing as sin No heaven, no hell, just some sort of "voice within" But them hippies got it wrong I'm telling ya And I speak from experience The devil walks the earth creating evil inteferience Evil inteferience Satan's got red skin, and horns upon his head But he dresses up like sexy woman, to lure us into bed I seen him meself in many bars and brothels across the nation I can resist church, I can resist work, but I can't resist temptation I can't resist temptation Chorus Satan is real, and he's a-coming after me He's the cause of my first marriage, 'twas a catastrophe What kind of things does Satan do? Well let me tell you mister The devil made me fall in love with me wife's own sister Verse 2 Drinking and smoking and fighting and gambling Aye, they're hard to resist I did nothing but buy the girl a drink All right, then we kissed Then I balled her in the alleyway -- we had a tryst But it wasn't me who done that. That was Satan Then her husband found out He was pissed He come at me with a shotgun Thank God he missed But he punched me in the mouth with a brass knuckle on his fist God damn the devil and the evil he's creating Chorus Satan is real and he is messing with me life You'd cry if you heard the story of how I lost me second wife 'Tis a sordid tale of drinkin', cunnilingin', and fellatin' And the cause of all these troubles S-A-T-A-N Satan Bridge Internet porn, I suppose I aught to tell you about my love of Internet porn Every night I log on to www.catholicgirls.com and I do not log off until the morn Satan is a master of disguise That's him inside those websites, he makes my trousers rise The url does not say Satan, aye but 'tis him Protect yourself, get your dsl an exorcism You may say that I'll burn in hell, it's all because Satan is alive It's to the Lake of Fire because I play with my hard drive That don't sound right, "I play with my hard drive." I play with my hard... ah hell, Satan's done it again! Chorus Satan is real and he's a bastard and he's the cause of it all I am only human I cannot be held responsible Life is like a rugby match and Satan keeps on winning So I don't care no more I've given up and I'm gonna keep on sinning So I'm revving up me motor and I'm cranking on the throttle I'll pick me up a girl and we will pick us up a bottle The night is young just think of all the sinning I can do I'm gonna start right now and I'm gonna start with.... YOU LEAVE COMMENTS LEAVE COMMENTS LEAVE COMMENTS RATE THE VIDEO RATE THE VIDEO RATE THE VIDEO And lastly, wish me luck on the competition. (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: Auto Comedy Earle Harp Ireland Irish Lawn McFadden Monroe Mower Music Satan Seamus Sketchies YouTube
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20,
03:27,
2008-04-21 17:15:24 Description: This video is dedicated to Tamara.... Art photos of Cher from one of her lost albums from the 70's plus others, along with the song, "Knock On Wood" from her lost 1976 album, (More) This video is dedicated to Tamara.... Art photos of Cher from one of her lost albums from the 70's plus others, along with the song, "Knock On Wood" from her lost 1976 album, "I'd Rather Believe In You". By lost I mean it has never been released on CD. A little history about this album. In 1976 Cher was married to Gregg Allman (she married him right after her divorce from Sonny Bono was final, on a weekend trip to Harrah's Las Vegas thanks to Bill Harrah's kind offer of a free plane trip. She would file for divorce from Gregg 11 days later and then recoinciled when she discovered her pregnancy) and doing the second Sonny and Cher show after asking Sonny to rejoin her as she was over wealmed doing her successful solo variety show CHER on CBS. Cher was VERY pregnant with her son Elijah Blue Allman during recording. The photos used on the album cover were actually taken for another of her lost Warner Brother's albums, Stars. Since she was so pregnant she did not wanna have her picture taken. So here she was doing a television variety show with her ex-husband, pregnant by her second husband and all of this was on television every week! Cher wore her revealing Bob Mackie gowns, sang, danced, and did comedy sketches. I remember one week she was so far along they had to put her in a bathtub full of bubbles to hide her expanding tummy. Elijah Blue Allman was born on July 10, 1976. Elijah, also known by his stage name Phillip Exeter Blue I, is the half brother of Chastity Bono, Delilah Island Allman, and Devon Allman . He is the lead singer and guitarist for the rock band Deadsy which consists of Alec Pure on drums, Dr. Nner on synthesizer, Carlton Megalodon on Z-tar, and Jens Funke on bass. At the age of 13, he toured as a guitarist with Cher on her "Heart of Stone Tour"; he was given his first guitar by Kiss bassist Gene Simmons who Cher was dating at the time.. Deadsy released two albums: 2002's Commencement and Phantasmagore, which came out on August 22, 2006. Elijah has said on MTV in interview on a program about children of famous rock musicians that, "I respect The Allman Brothers Band very much, but I've always been more into Black Sabbath, David Bowie, and Metallica." It was announced in February 2007 that Elijah is working on a solo record....... Cher raised Chastity and Elijah as a single mother.... Cher was on the cover of every tabliod you can name every single week! Here is the track listing for the album and its production and staff credits. Side 1 Long Distance, Love Affair I"d Rather Believe In You I Know (You Don't Love Me No More) Silver Wings & Golden Rings Flash Back Side 2 It's A Cryin' Shame Early Morning Strangers Knock On Wood Spring Borrowed Time Produced by Steve Barry & Michael Omartian Arranged and conducted by Michael Omartian Musicians All Keyboard Michael Omartian Drums Jeff Porcarno Bass David Hungate, Lee Sklar, Scotty Edwards Guitars Dean Parks, Ben Benay, Lee Ritenour, Victor Feldman, Steve Barri Harmonica Ben Benay Horns Chuck Findlay, Steve Madaio, Nino Tempo, Steve Douglas and Lew McCreary The Sid Sharp Stings Concertmaster Sid Sharp Backgroud Vocals Ginger Blake, Julian Tillman, Maxine Williard, Jim Haas, Kerry Chater, Michael Omartian, Stephanie Spring, Gene Nelson, Michael Price, Dan Walsh Recorded at ABC Recording Studios Inc. Engineer Phil Kaye Assistant engineer Howard Gale Album Coordinator Karen White And a special thanks to Elijah, for waiting until the day after I finished my album....Cher. Art Direction by Ed Thrasher Photograpy By Norman Seeff This song was later recorded by Ami Stewart as a dance track and was a BIG hit. Wonder where Ami Stewart is now? It's like thunder, It's like lightening, The way you love me is frightening... I better knock... On Wood! Baby! (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: 1976 Actress Album Ami Believe Bono Cher Diva Id In Knock legend Lost On Rather Singer Stewart Wood You
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10,
00:29,
2008-04-21 17:42:45 Description: Moo-ing Mercedes by Juliet Aucreman I was raised to mock Mercedes. In my New England Puritanical upbringing, Mercedes luxury cars were equated with evil itself. Mercedes stood for nothing but (More) Moo-ing Mercedes by Juliet Aucreman I was raised to mock Mercedes. In my New England Puritanical upbringing, Mercedes luxury cars were equated with evil itself. Mercedes stood for nothing but over-inflated egos. For most of my life, not owning a Mercedes was easily accomplished. A few years ago, I ran into a little dilemma. I had the perfect car, a car whose paint job yelled "Howdy!" A brilliant turquoise, my car put blushing Smurfs to shame. Though I often lost my keys, my day-planner, my wallet, and my mind, I never misplaced that car. Its constant presence gave my life stability. But my husband was biased against my car. He deemed Ford Escorts unsafe. Despite its obnoxious visibility, glowing like toxic waste as it sped down the highway, Corky remained unmoved. So I started hunting around for a replacement. One day I spotted an ad at the local library: $6,000 dollars for a cute-looking white Mercedes. It had 97,000 miles on it: surely the Mercedes would run for another 300,000 miles. I reported my discovery to Corky, and when he didn't nix the idea. I knew he was intrigued. Corky called the Mercedes' owner. She worked at a museum. She had bought the Mercedes new, and had maintained it fastidiously. All of this scored major points with Corky, so we met up with her. Corky inspected the Mercedes, every inch of it, examining the paint, examining the engine, examining its karma. I know he was ecstatic, because we bought the car. Suddenly, I was driving a white Mercedes. I felt uneasy. My upbringing dictated that driving a Mercedes was sinful - I knew I made other drivers feel resentful and inadequate. So I tried to be extra courteous on the freeway to show other drivers that even a Mercedes owner could be nice. By the hundreds, they shot past me in their own Mercedes. And now I had a new problem. White Mercedes cars in Orange County, California, are like suburban camouflage. Now, when I left my car in parking lots, it just vanished. Trying to increase my car's find-ability, I stumbled upon an obvious solution: painting the outside with black splotches, like a cow. Trying to contain my excitement, I shared my idea with Corky. His response? "It'll ruin the paint. You'll never be able to sell it." That surprised me. I thought I'd be driving the Mercedes forever. Still, I wanted to show respect, so I racked my brain for ways to protect the car from black paint. Then it hit me. "I'll just paint white spots on the car first. That'll protect the car from the black spots." Corky said nothing, so obviously he approved. The next Saturday, I started painting white acrylic spots on the Mercedes. As I began the fourth large spot, I heard Corky enter the garage. "That's NOT funny. I want you to remove those spots immediately." "But we have to protect the car from the black spots..." "You're not putting black spots on the car." "I'm not?" "It'll cause the paint to fade un-uniformly." That stumped me. I'd assumed that white was "faded" incarnate. I looked at Corky's monochromatic car. I felt sorry for it; it would never look like a cow. I agreed to pick off the soft paint, on the condition that Corky be nice about the situation. Reluctantly, he agreed. I invited the neighborhood children over to help pick with their fingernails. At first they were reluctant - they wanted the car to look like a cow, too. But soon a bunch of them took up stations around the sedan, and scratched away. As I picked at the paint, images of my ancestors buzzed through my head. They were driving through the clouds...in white Mercedes. Whenever they honked their horns, their Mercedes mooed. All their Mercedes were spotted -- that made sense -- how else to find them in the clouds? (Less)
Channel: youtube Rate it: Rate:
18,
04:11,
2008-04-22 09:03:34 Description: This is my ORIGINAL vindictive valentine for all the cynical, lonely people out there. Rock on dudes!!! To Whom It May Concern: Here is a poem. Happy Valentines Day! I hope you enjoy it, while you (More) This is my ORIGINAL vindictive valentine for all the cynical, lonely people out there. Rock on dudes!!! To Whom It May Concern: Here is a poem. Happy Valentines Day! I hope you enjoy it, while you read what I say. This holiday's stupid and society's to blame, Because every year it's exactly the same. Women get flowers that will wither and die. The "love in the air" is really cyanide. Cards are just paper with a few cheesy words. Love songs sound painful, like ten strangled birds. Cupid is Satan in a sweet, little form. The wings are distractions so we won't notice the horns. Love at first sight is such a cliché. Maybe you should walk...no...RUN the other way. All the frogs that I've kissed have turned out to be toads. I wish candlelight dinners would somehow explode. Oh, thanks for the heart, lace trimmed and red. I wish that I'd gotten something useful instead. That's so adorable! A stuffed teddy bear? Don't mind me puking in the gift box over there. Dancing under moonlight must be like heaven Cause that's where you're going. Look, Armageddon! Diamonds, in the end, are just shiny stones. They won't give you warm fuzzies when you're sad and alone. That smile on your face from getting engaged Will later be replaced with the fires of rage. And we can't forget what's important in life. A super rich husband or a totally hot wife. Love is just chemicals that mess with your brain. It makes you act foolish and drives you insane. Love is a game where the players all lose. You cheat, lie and try, but your heart ends up bruised. Yes, it's annoying to hear someone complain. You know what? Go ahead. Throw your money down the drain. I admit I'm a cynic. I hope you're not pissed. If you are, I don't care. Go jump off a cliff. And now, once again, I just want to say, I hope you have a Happy...oh screw it...I hate Valentines Day! Written with lots of "love" from, Muriel P. P.S. Don't take this "valentine" TOO seriously...If I personally offended you or hurt your feelings, you can always call Dr. Phil with your sob story. If this mean, cynical poem entertained you on this dreadful day...Then I have done my job. Thank you for your time. (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: alone bunny cards cheat cynical diamond flowers frogs hallmark hate hurt kiss lonely love muriel valentine vindictive
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12,
00:29,
2007-05-22 23:26:04 Description: Moo-ing Mercedes by Juliet Aucreman
I was raised to mock Mercedes. In my New England Puritanical upbringing, Mercedes luxury cars were equated with evil itself. Mercedes stood for nothing but (More) Moo-ing Mercedes by Juliet Aucreman
I was raised to mock Mercedes. In my New England Puritanical upbringing, Mercedes luxury cars were equated with evil itself. Mercedes stood for nothing but over-inflated egos. For most of my life, not owning a Mercedes was easily accomplished.
A few years ago, I ran into a little dilemma. I had the perfect car, a car whose paint job yelled "Howdy!" A brilliant turquoise, my car put blushing Smurfs to shame. Though I often lost my keys, my day-planner, my wallet, and my mind, I never misplaced that car. Its constant presence gave my life stability.
But my husband was biased against my car. He deemed Ford Escorts unsafe. Despite its obnoxious visibility, glowing like toxic waste as it sped down the highway, Corky remained unmoved. So I started hunting around for a replacement.
One day I spotted an ad at the local library: $6,000 dollars for a cute-looking white Mercedes. It had 97,000 miles on it: surely the Mercedes would run for another 300,000 miles. I reported my discovery to Corky, and when he didn't nix the idea. I knew he was intrigued.
Corky called the Mercedes' owner. She worked at a museum. She had bought the Mercedes new, and had maintained it fastidiously. All of this scored major points with Corky, so we met up with her. Corky inspected the Mercedes, every inch of it, examining the paint, examining the engine, examining its karma. I know he was ecstatic, because we bought the car.
Suddenly, I was driving a white Mercedes. I felt uneasy. My upbringing dictated that driving a Mercedes was sinful - I knew I made other drivers feel resentful and inadequate. So I tried to be extra courteous on the freeway to show other drivers that even a Mercedes owner could be nice. By the hundreds, they shot past me in their own Mercedes.
And now I had a new problem. White Mercedes cars in Orange County, California, are like suburban camouflage. Now, when I left my car in parking lots, it just vanished. Trying to increase my car's find-ability, I stumbled upon an obvious solution: painting the outside with black splotches, like a cow. Trying to contain my excitement, I shared my idea with Corky.
His response? "It'll ruin the paint. You'll never be able to sell it."
That surprised me. I thought I'd be driving the Mercedes forever. Still, I wanted to show respect, so I racked my brain for ways to protect the car from black paint. Then it hit me.
"I'll just paint white spots on the car first. That'll protect the car from the black spots."
Corky said nothing, so obviously he approved.
The next Saturday, I started painting white acrylic spots on the Mercedes. As I began the fourth large spot, I heard Corky enter the garage.
"That's NOT funny. I want you to remove those spots immediately."
"But we have to protect the car from the black spots..."
"You're not putting black spots on the car."
"I'm not?"
"It'll cause the paint to fade un-uniformly."
That stumped me. I'd assumed that white was "faded" incarnate. I looked at Corky's monochromatic car. I felt sorry for it; it would never look like a cow.
I agreed to pick off the soft paint, on the condition that Corky be nice about the situation. Reluctantly, he agreed. I invited the neighborhood children over to help pick with their fingernails. At first they were reluctant - they wanted the car to look like a cow, too. But soon a bunch of them took up stations around the sedan, and scratched away.
As I picked at the paint, images of my ancestors buzzed through my head. They were driving through the clouds...in white Mercedes. Whenever they honked their horns, their Mercedes mooed.
All their Mercedes were spotted -- that made sense -- how else to find them in the clouds? (Less)
Channel: youtube Rate it: Rate:
19,
03:00,
2008-03-03 21:09:56 Description: I am sorry that this is so pixelated and low res - I am trying to fix that without getting booted from the contest - I may post a separate, better copy.
This is my YouTube Sketchies II submission, (More) I am sorry that this is so pixelated and low res - I am trying to fix that without getting booted from the contest - I may post a separate, better copy.
This is my YouTube Sketchies II submission, and the launch of my channel. CowboyMachine is the future home of My Pink Pimp.
Very Important:
LEAVE COMMENTS - RATE THE VIDEO - OK?
The video contains snippets of the song "Satan Is Real," the full song is too long to put in its entirety.
Here are the lyrics for the full song:
"Satan is Real" - hear it all at www.MySpace.com/earlemonroe
Verse 1
Some people say there's no such thing as sin
No heaven, no hell, just some sort of "voice within"
But them hippies got it wrong I'm telling ya
And I speak from experience
The devil walks the earth creating evil inteferience
Evil inteferience
Satan's got red skin, and horns upon his head
But he dresses up like sexy woman, to lure us into bed
I seen him meself in many bars and brothels across the nation
I can resist church, I can resist work, but I can't resist temptation
I can't resist temptation
Chorus
Satan is real, and he's a-coming after me
He's the cause of my first marriage, 'twas a catastrophe
What kind of things does Satan do? Well let me tell you mister
The devil made me fall in love with me wife's own sister
Verse 2
Drinking and smoking and fighting and gambling
Aye, they're hard to resist
I did nothing but buy the girl a drink
All right, then we kissed
Then I balled her in the alleyway -- we had a tryst
But it wasn't me who done that. That was Satan
Then her husband found out
He was pissed
He come at me with a shotgun
Thank God he missed
But he punched me in the mouth with a brass knuckle on his fist
God damn the devil and the evil he's creating
Chorus
Satan is real and he is messing with me life
You'd cry if you heard the story of how I lost me second wife
'Tis a sordid tale of drinkin', cunnilingin', and fellatin'
And the cause of all these troubles S-A-T-A-N Satan
Bridge
Internet porn, I suppose I aught to tell you about my love of Internet porn
Every night I log on to www.catholicgirls.com and I do not log off until the morn
Satan is a master of disguise
That's him inside those websites, he makes my trousers rise
The url does not say Satan, aye but 'tis him
Protect yourself, get your dsl an exorcism
You may say that I'll burn in hell, it's all because Satan is alive
It's to the Lake of Fire because I play with my hard drive
That don't sound right, "I play with my hard drive."
I play with my hard... ah hell, Satan's done it again!
Chorus
Satan is real and he's a bastard and he's the cause of it all
I am only human I cannot be held responsible
Life is like a rugby match and Satan keeps on winning
So I don't care no more I've given up and I'm gonna keep on sinning
So I'm revving up me motor and I'm cranking on the throttle
I'll pick me up a girl and we will pick us up a bottle
The night is young just think of all the sinning I can do
I'm gonna start right now and I'm gonna start with.... YOU
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And lastly, wish me luck on the competition. (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: Auto Comedy Earle Harp Ireland Irish Lawn McFadden Monroe Mower Music Satan Seamus Sketchies YouTube
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7,
04:11,
2008-02-10 11:12:06 Description: This is my ORIGINAL vindictive valentine for all the cynical, lonely people out there. Rock on dudes!!!
To Whom It May Concern:
Here is a poem. Happy Valentines Day!
I hope you enjoy it, while (More) This is my ORIGINAL vindictive valentine for all the cynical, lonely people out there. Rock on dudes!!!
To Whom It May Concern:
Here is a poem. Happy Valentines Day!
I hope you enjoy it, while you read what I say.
This holiday's stupid and society's to blame,
Because every year it's exactly the same.
Women get flowers that will wither and die.
The "love in the air" is really cyanide.
Cards are just paper with a few cheesy words.
Love songs sound painful, like ten strangled birds.
Cupid is Satan in a sweet, little form.
The wings are distractions so we won't notice the horns.
Love at first sight is such a cliché.
Maybe you should walk...no...RUN the other way.
All the frogs that I've kissed have turned out to be toads.
I wish candlelight dinners would somehow explode.
Oh, thanks for the heart, lace trimmed and red.
I wish that I'd gotten something useful instead.
That's so adorable! A stuffed teddy bear?
Don't mind me puking in the gift box over there.
Dancing under moonlight must be like heaven
Cause that's where you're going. Look, Armageddon!
Diamonds, in the end, are just shiny stones.
They won't give you warm fuzzies when you're sad and alone.
That smile on your face from getting engaged
Will later be replaced with the fires of rage.
And we can't forget what's important in life.
A super rich husband or a totally hot wife.
Love is just chemicals that mess with your brain.
It makes you act foolish and drives you insane.
Love is a game where the players all lose.
You cheat, lie and try, but your heart ends up bruised.
Yes, it's annoying to hear someone complain.
You know what? Go ahead. Throw your money down the drain.
I admit I'm a cynic. I hope you're not pissed.
If you are, I don't care. Go jump off a cliff.
And now, once again, I just want to say,
I hope you have a Happy...oh screw it...I hate Valentines Day!
Written with lots of "love" from,
Muriel P.
P.S. Don't take this "valentine" TOO seriously...If I personally offended you or hurt your feelings, you can always call Dr. Phil with your sob story. If this mean, cynical poem entertained you on this dreadful day...Then I have done my job. Thank you for your time. (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: alone bunny cards cheat cynical diamond flowers frogs hallmark hate hurt kiss lonely love muriel valentine vindictive
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27,
03:29,
2009-02-07 21:44:00 Description: Husband-and-wife duo Delaney and Bonnie Bramlett were among the foremost proponents of blue-eyed soul in the 1960s and '70s. They're famous for luring Eric Clapton into their midst and (More) Husband-and-wife duo Delaney and Bonnie Bramlett were among the foremost proponents of blue-eyed soul in the 1960s and '70s. They're famous for luring Eric Clapton into their midst and influencing the direction of his solo work, but their own legacy stands up well beyond that. Delaney & Bonnie operated in a time when the boundaries of music were bursting open, and their sound is an organic mix of rock, blues, soul, gospel, and country which made for timeless songs and memorable performances.
Accounts of the origin of "Groupie (Superstar)" vary somewhat, but the song grew out of the late 1969/early 1970 nexus of English and American musicians known as Delaney, Bonnie, & Friends that involved Delaney and Bonnie Bramlett, Leon Russell, Eric Clapton, Duane Allman, Rita Coolidge, and various others. The song's working title during portions of its development was "Groupie Song". In its first recorded incarnation, the song was called "Groupie (Superstar)", and was recorded and released as the B-Side to the Delaney & Bonnie single "Comin' Home" in December 1969. Released by Atlantic Records,, the full credit on the single was to Delaney & Bonnie and Friends Featuring Eric Clapton. Sung by Bonnie, the arrangement featured slow guitar and bass parts building up to an almost gospelish chorus using horns. The song featured Leon Russell on keyboards, Eric Clapton on guitar and Rita Coolidge doing background vocals.
Some accounts have Coolidge suggesting or inspiring the song's creation in the first place, and working with Bonnie Bramlett on her portion of the writing. Coolidge would later go on to sing the song in Joe Cocker's live concert shows and would record the song for Cocker's live "Mad Dogs and Englishmen" album.
The song was about, as the title suggests, a groupie who holds a strong love for a rock star after a short sexual involvement. He has moved on to the next town, and despite his promises to see her again she can now only hear him on the radio. She is just left pure hopeless yearning as evidenced by the chorus:
Don't you remember you told me you loved me, baby ? Said you'd be coming back this way again, baby ?
Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby...!
Delaney & Bonnie were not yet well known at the time, and "Comin' Home" only reached #84 on the U.S. Singles Pop Chart, although it achieved a peak of #16 on the UK Singles Chart.
At the time I created this video, I wasn't able to find out exactly which rock star the "groupie" is longing for, but for this video, So I chose to focus on one of the rock icons of that era, Jim Morrison of the Doors. The video features a few concert clips as well as photos and home movies of Pamela Courson, his common-law wife.
I've since learned that the song was actually written about Eric Clapton.
GROUPIE (Superstar)
(Words and music by Leon Russell and Bonnie Bramlett)
Long ago and so far away,
I fell in love with you
Before the second show.
Your guitar,
It sounds so sweet and clear -
But it's just the radio
And you're not really here.
Don't you remember you told me you loved me, baby?
(You told me you loved me!)
Said you'd be coming back this way again, baby...
(I've been waiting for you, baby!)
Don't you remember you told me you loved me, baby? Woah-oh, mmmm...
Loneliness is such a sad affair (sad affair)
And I can hardly wait to sleep with you again.
What to say to make you come again? (come again)
Come back and play for me your sad guitar.
Oh, yeah! Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby!
(I've been waiting for you, baby!)
Don't you remember you told me you loved me, baby?
(You said you loved me, baby!)
Said you'd be coming back this way again, baby
(Baby, my baby!)
Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby!
(I've been waiting for you, baby!)
Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby... (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: Bonnie Bramlett Carpenter Carpenters Clapton Coolidge Delaney Eric Karen Leon Richard Rita Russell
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0,
08:10,
2009-10-21 21:20:26 Description: Regarded by her husband, Sita of dark eyes, and intent upon her husbands welfare, followed Him to the entrance and said, I shall be ministering to you, seeing you initiated, engaged in ceremonies, (More) Regarded by her husband, Sita of dark eyes, and intent upon her husbands welfare, followed Him to the entrance and said, I shall be ministering to you, seeing you initiated, engaged in ceremonies, wearing excellent deer skin for cloth and carrying horns in my hands. (Sita Devi speaking to Lord Rama, Valmiki Ramayana, Ayodhya Kand, Sec 21) (Less)
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5,
10:29,
2009-10-26 03:33:57 Description: It's not all peachy in Georgia in the Season 2 finale. Sheree anticipates the debut of her clothing line---but there's a catfight at this catwalk when nene takes on Kandi. It's a no-no (More) It's not all peachy in Georgia in the Season 2 finale. Sheree anticipates the debut of her clothing line---but there's a catfight at this catwalk when nene takes on Kandi. It's a no-no for nene when she also locks horns with Gregg and clashes with Kim. Meanwhile, Lisa prepares for life without her husband's NFL paycheck. (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: Real Housewives Catwalks Cat Fights 10/22/2009 Part1 part2 part3 part4 part5 part6 premiere new watch full october 22
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13,
00:00,
2009-01-07 09:12:55 Description: Prof. Ze'ev Herzog of Tel Aviv University stated: "the Israelites were never in Egypt, did not wander the desert, did not conquer the land, and did not pass it on to the twelve tribes". (More) Prof. Ze'ev Herzog of Tel Aviv University stated: "the Israelites were never in Egypt, did not wander the desert, did not conquer the land, and did not pass it on to the twelve tribes". Moreover, the Jewish God YHWH had a female consort - the goddess Asherah!
His conclusion that the kingdom of David and Solomon was at best a small tribal monarchy, at worst total myth, has made enemies for him in the camps of traditional Jewish and Christian belief systems. He asserts: all evidence demonstrates that the Jews did not adopt monotheism until the 7th Century BCE - a heresy according to the Biblical tradition dating it to Moses at Mount Sinai.
Tel Aviv University's archaeological investigation at Megiddo and examination of the six-sided gate there dates it to the 9th Century BCE, not the 10th Century BCE claimed by the 1960's investigator Yigael Yadin who attributed it to Solomon. Herzog, moreover, states that Solomon and David are "entirely absent in the archaeological record".
In addition, Herzog's colleague, Israel Finkelstein, claims the Jews were nothing more than nomadic Canaanites who bartered with the city dwellers.
The team's studies concluded that Jerusalem did not have any central status until 722 BCE with the destruction of its northern rival Samaria.
However, the real bombshell is Herzog's discovery of numerous references to Yahweh having a consort in the form of Asherah. Inscriptions, written in Hebrew by official Jewish scribes in the 8th century BCE, were found in numerous sites all over the land. For Yahweh, supposedly the "One God", to have had a female consort and, of all people, the goddess Asherah, is dynamite of wide ranging significance.
The use of Yahweh as the name of God has always fuelled speculation and philosophical argument. YHWH, sometimes pronounced Jehovah, is taken to mean "I AM" or "I AM WHO I AM". There is also the puzzle of the rule that his mysterious real name is not to be spoken.
The identification of the goddess Asherah (Asherat) as His consort somewhere within the original Jewish faith leads to some explosive conclusions about the identity of the Jewish/Christian God of the Cosmos, the one Monotheistic God with whom we are so familiar from western religion.
But before looking at Asherah, and what she means to the identity of Yahweh, it is worth taking a look at another goddess, Ashteroth. Her significance will become evident a little later. Referred to as an "abomination" in 2 Kings, Ashteroth was an important deity in the Near East pantheons.
To the Sumerians she was IN.ANNA (Anu's beloved) and is an important character in the Sumerian Epics. To the Assyrians and Babylonians she was Ishtar; Ashtoreth was her name for the Canaanites; to the Greeks - Aphrodite; the Romans - Venus. THE MOST IMPORTANT EQUIVALENT HOWEVER IS THE EGYPTIAN GODDES HATHOR, who the Greeks identified with Aphrodite. Hathor was the wife of Horus, the God of War. Hathor is identified with the symbol of the cow, and statues of her in the 26th Dynasty (572 - 525 BC) in Egypt actually depict her as a cow.
Asherah, (whose name means "she who walks in the sea") supposedly consort of the supreme god El, was also referred to as Elath (the goddess). According to the Ugarit tradition, whose clay tablets contain the earliest known alphabet, she was consort of El, and mother of seventy gods. She is also associated with Baal and is supposed to have interceded to her husband, the supreme god, on Baal's behalf, for the building of a palace - in order to grant him equal status with other gods.
In the cuniform tablets of Ras Shamrah (Circa 1400 BCE) the head of the Pantheon was El; his wife was Asherat-of-the-sea (Asherah). After El, the greatest god was Baal, son of El and Asherah. Curiously, Baal's consort is his mother, Asherah. In the Lebanon traditions Baal is equated with Jupiter.
Carvings of Asherah in Syria show her wearing Egyptian head-dress. She was also referred to later as "the cow" - a reference to her great age.
Significantly, Baalat (an important Goddess at Byblos) is depicted in carvings as having cow's horns, between which is a halo. Baalat is in fact the form of Asherah when she appears alongside Baal.
But what does this say about the identity of Yahweh? The Bible has always presented a confusing picture of Yahweh. In the light of Herzog's discoveries and conclusions that Yahweh's consort was Asherah, it deserves a closer examination.
This indicates, as does Herzog's work, that the Jewish people evolved from polytheism to monotheism with the promotion of a god who had been known by a variety of names, into one supreme God, Yahweh (whose real name must not be spoken), and that they adopted for this purpose, not the supreme God of the Pantheons, El, but his son - ISH.KUR, Baal, Hadad, El-Shaddai, an entity who was in open revolt against his father El, and ultimately aided in this revolt by his mother and consort, Asherah.
And "MOSES" knew it from Khemet Mystery School. (Less)
Channel: youtubeTags: 18th Abiru Akhenaten Akhenaton Amo Ancient Anubis Bible Chrestos Christ Christian Christos cult Dynasty Egypt El Elohim Exodus Habiru Hathor Hebrew Horus Hyksos Isis Kabalah Kabbalah Khemet knowledge KRST Messiah Moses Mystery occult Osiris Pharaoh Quaballah religion School science Thoth Torah XPCT XPCTOC YHWH
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53,
01:37,
2007-09-23 14:03:38 Description: Espetáculo Tradições
Balé da Mata - Cia. de Dança Contemporânea.
Direção artística: Elísio Pitta
http://www.ocoliseu.com.br
(More) Espetáculo Tradições
Balé da Mata - Cia. de Dança Contemporânea.
Direção artística: Elísio Pitta
http://www.ocoliseu.com.br
Oyá Iansã
Mais conhecida no Brasil pelo nome de Yansã, é a divindade dos ventos, das tempestades e do rio Niger, que em Yorubá chama-se Odô Oyá, rio de Oyá.
No Brasil as pessoas dedicadas a Oyá-Yansã usam colares de conta cor de vinho e a quarta-feira é o dia da semana que lhe é consagrado, mesmo dia de Xangô, seu marido. Seus símbolos são os chifres de búfalo e um alfanje colocados sobre o seu Pejí. Ela recebe oferendas de cabras e acarajés (acarás, na África). Quando se manifesta em uma das iniciadas está adornada com uma coroa cujas franjas de contas escondem o seu rosto; ela trás um alfanje em uma das mãos e na outra um erueixim feito de cauda de cavalo. Suas danças são guerreiras e se Ogum esta presente, ela não deixa de se empenhar num duelo, lembrança, sem dúvida, de suas antigas divergências. Evoca também, por seus movimentos sinuosos e rápidos, as tempestades e os ventos enfurecidos. Seus fiéis saúdam-na gritando: Epa Heyi Oyá.
No sincretismo brasileiro ela é Santa Bárbara.
Oyá Iansã
Better known in Brazil as Yansã, she is the deity of the winds, of the storms and of the Niger river, which in Yorubá is called Odô Oyá, the River of Oyá.
In Brazil, her devotees use wine-colored beads and the day dedicated to her is Wednesday, which is the same day dedicated to Xangô, her husband. Yansã's symbols are buffalo horns and a dagger, which are placed upon her Pejí (altar). She receives offers made of goats and acarajés (also called acarás, in Africa).
When she manifests herself in one of the initiates, she is adorned with a crown whose pearls hide her face; she holds a dagger in one hand and in the other hand she holds a erueixim made of horse tail. Yansã's dances are warrior-like and if Ogum is present she can't avoid a duel, for sure a reminder of their former disagreements. Through her sinuous and fast movements, Yansã also evokes storms and the whirlwinds. Her devotees address her by shouting: Epa Heyi Oyá. In Brazil she is the equivalent of Saint Barbara. (Less)
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